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Issue 345
23 October 2011
Updated Weekly


OLD BAG: This is an archive story from Issue 264 - 15 Sep 2008

Blue is the colour

John Terry

Jo rushes 4 yards, 2nd down and 6

Frank Lampard

"A bigger boy did it and ran away"

Own goal horror for star's debut

Britain's most expensive footballer had a horror start to his Premiership career - scoring an own goal on his debut.

Things had started brightly for the former Real Madrid player in the game between Manchester City and Chelsea, that was until he slotted the ball into the Chelsea net from 20 yards out.


"I was gutted," explained the Brazilian. "I thought Peter had it covered but it took that nudge off Lamps' back and sailed into the top corner. It should really be Frank's OG but I have to put my hands up and say that it was my fault."

There was more bad news for Robinho after the game when he was told that due him being contracted to Manchester City, he won't be able to play for Chelsea until the teams meet again in March.

Hay baler

Chelsea however had concerns of their own as skipper John Terry was sent off near the end of the game for GBH. "It was self-defence", complained the England captain. "He came right at me with a ball - and probably a knife. Instinct took over I guess and I just took him out. I don't want people calling me a hero or anything - I think anyone would have done the same in my position."

Do you know who I am?

Frank Lampard witnessed the whole thing: "I can't believe this injustice, John was just minding his own business, enjoying a nice walk on a sunny afternoon and then this happens. It's getting so you can't even leave the house these days."

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Also in Issue 264