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Issue 345
23 October 2011
Updated Weekly

Eriksson in cheese and onion scandal

OLD BAG: This is an archive story from Issue 7 - 16 Jul 2003

England manger Sven Goran Erikkssonn found himself caught up in yet another tedious close season drive for Chelsea related stories today as he was seen exiting a north London news agent eating a packet of Cheese and Onion crisps only two corners away from Roman Abramovitch's luxury apartment.

The F.A. were spurred into an unprecedented early action by releasing a statement to the press declaring that not only was Mr. Errrikkksssonnnnn committed to leading England through to the European championships in 2004 but was also "fully committed to salt and vinegar crisps and was only eating cheese and onion crisps at that time because a small boy called Timmy carrying a lovely little puppy offered them to him and he didn't wish to seem ungrateful.

This however did not satisfy an increasingly desperate pack of journalists who were told only last week that the National boss was "not interested in cheese and onion crisps" and was "very much a salt and vinegar man.". When probed outside his London Mansion this morning Mr. Errikksson said "Although I am very much eating salt and vinegar that is not to say that I do not not like the other type of crisps. But just because I eat other types does not mean I stop eating salt and vinegar. I love salt and vinegar. For me they are the only crisps at this moment in time."

When asked if he would consider switching to cheese and onion crisps he reply. "You cannot rule anything out. By the way what has this got to do with Chelsea."

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Also in Issue 7